This blog was written by mommy blogger, Shilpa Bindlish
Motherhood has always been the most celebrated feeling for all the women around the world. There is certainly a glory that this title brings along, but there are unfavourable challenges that are specific to ‘working moms’. I still remember how dicey the situation had become when I had to decide whether to continue or sacrifice my job after my child was born. I knew if I had to resume my work, it would demands more on my effort, time, energy and resources to ‘balance’ work and family life. But I take pride to assert that I faced the situation and had been able to succeed.
So based on my experience, I’m sharing helpful tips on how working moms can deal with this dilemma and make their life easier without having to sacrifice their career or family:
1. Raising Kids In Nuclear Family:
In good old times, when multigenerational or joint families were the norm of society, the elderly family members used to take care of children in the house in the absence of parents. But over the past years with increasing number of only two-parent families, the mothers are expected to take a career break and be around children to for their physical growth and mental development.
You can always enroll your school-going child to a certified day-care centre that ensures providing safe and healthy environment for him after school hours. For a younger baby, a trustworthy in-house babysitter may take care of baby while the mommy works.
2. Tackling Sick Children
As an extension to nuclear family concerns, most working moms feel alarmed of the possibility of their children getting sick (I really do). Because the responsibility of taking care for sick children usually falls on the mother. The situation to settle on either an inflexible professional schedule or a parental obligation brings the victim to a meltdown mode.
The best game plan to pull through this tricky situation is to prevent child’s illness. It’s customary for many parents to ignore initial warning sign of an upcoming illness and hope it won’t last. But if you’re aware of usual symptoms or causes of your child’s sickness, make a prior arrangement to nip the problem in the bud. My child who is allergic to insect bites since childhood and had suffered awful skin allergies in the past, is now safely enjoying monsoon season without threat of mosquito-borne diseases as I’ve resorted to the protection of Goodknight Fabric Roll-On to avoid exposure to icky mosquitoes. Just following a simple regime of applying four dots of all-natural product on my child’s clothes whenever he steps out for school or play has rescued me from panicky time.
It also makes a difference to make minor lifestyle changes including diet, clothing, outing time etc when it’s the time of year when it’s more probable for your child to fall ill. On a motherly note, try co-ordinating with an understanding colleague and do tell yourself “ this is just life in the moment, let me spend the day with apple of my eye”.
3. Running Late Of Schedule
Nothing adds to the stress of mommy if something doesn’t go as planned in the beginning of the day. The uncertainty of the morning routine puts you in situation where unanticipated problems arise and leave you frustrated and dejected.
Preparing ahead of time is the key. Carefully look over the next day’s to-do list a night prior and divide the schedule. It’s better to decide priorities of the day and delegate few chores to your spouse. Marking important dates on calendar or setting a reminder on your smart device will let you start your day on calm note without missing any relevant event especially when it’s related to your child’s school.
4. Professional Competence
Despite the claims of companies to offer compatible work conditions for females, many mothers are not given key roles and are looked down upon if they demend for flexible working hours for themselves. It induces a feeling of lower self-esteem and low confidence in most women.
Do not be hesitant to forward a written plan to your company’s HR team requesting them to adjust your schedule in a way that you may complete the required weekly working hours in a flexible manner. It will reinforce faith of employer for you if you may present the company with a substitute/alternate to compensate your responsibilities in case of emergency.
5. Mommy Guilt
Women have a right to have a career the way men do and they should be proud that they are capable of multitasking. But if you’ve chosen your career over your family or child, the creepy feeling of being away from your child may strike you any time. There can be infinite reasons for a mommy to feel guilty for not being a ‘perfect’ parent. At times, these feelings are subject to societal idealisation of motherhood.
Pause before you react. Give yourself a moment before you curse yourself of the worst guilt-inducing moments. Think of your contribution in fulfilling your child’s needs by going to work. Find practical solution that may spare you some time to make good memories with family and children. Lastly, remind yourself that feeling guilty is actually a sign that you truly care for your child.
6. Communication Gap With Partner/Family
Living your choices amidst everyday chaos severely affects relationship between the couple and the implications of the situation might be to different extent. Many a times, marital relationship is strained due to lack of time or excessive fatigue, especially when both partners have long working hours or when the male partner poses a hands-off approach in sharing household responsibilities.
To tackle this very important yet less-acknowledged issue, both the partners must agree to consciously make an effort to get closer to each other despite an exhaustive schedule. It takes only a few moments every day to focus on keeping your marriage happy.
There are many more obligations, work commitments and family matters than ever before that every working mom is juggling with. It might be hard to maintained sanity with life continually getting busier, but I’m sure these simple tips would help mighty mommy increase the harmony in her home..